reaching for excellence

guess what! I think I'm converted. Cool huh? converted to what you ask? Only good things, like God's approval, and love. I'm back to seeking perfection rather than a lazy approach to goodness. what I can't do, is mess up my life, and someone elses that I love and act like everythings fine. Because that's super messed up. I love God so much and I love the gospel so much, and I love my best friend/ boyfriend so much. I can't wait until all the good things happen.

being a girl: taking the brunt of all the "when are you two going to get married?" questions.

my new favorite song: Taper Jean Girl, Kings of Leon :)

what can I even say- I'm feeling so speechless but here goes nothing.

Standing on the edge of something- like this afternoon, when I sat on a boulder that was on the perimeter of the Grand canyon. The sun was beating down- I could feel the UV rays penetrating my skin- off in the distance I see a wall of rain falling over the canyon, beating down on the river- I'm on the margin right? I want that rain. I want to feel the beads of water hit my bare arms and feet. I want it, the blessing of moisture- I see lightning strike. the storm passes by me without even a single drop of perfection for me. Is it selfish to have wanted that satisfaction from cold canyon rain? Was it wrong to have been dissapointed at not receiving it? Probably. This moment of question leads to introspection. If I had put myself on the right side of the canyon, maybe just maybe I could've been given the rain. The right side, not the left. Maybe if I take his name upon me. Maybe if I avoid trangression to blot his name out. Maybe if I recognize the name I've been called. Maybe if I stay sensitive to the still small voice I'll be put on the correct side of the canyon, I'll be led across the ravine, I'll be guided to excellence in complete and utter humility, in willingness to do all that I can.